Wednesday, December 9, 2009

I'm Having a Cow

For 8.35 months I was pretty damn cool about this whole thing. Even though I'd never wanted kids and was shocked that I got knocked up - I've been cool (kinda) you know? Chino is so thrilled and my Mom happy how could I not get on the banwagon?

And then last week came, my doctor made a couple of stupid comments and I found myself laying down the next day feeling Daisy move and thinking to myself "OH MY GAWWWWWDD. THERE IS A BABY IN THERE AND SHE'S GOING TO COME OUT OF WHERE??? SHE'S HUGE!! SHHHHIIIIIIITTTTT!! AND THEN? And then I'm going to have a baby in my HOUSE and it's going to be MINE and I'm going to have to KEEP IT. KEEEEEEEP IT. Shit. Shit. Shitshitshitshitshitshitshit..." You get the point.

LOL I've heard of getting cold feet before getting married but I never expected to have a panic attack 2 weeks before my baby's due. I shat my pants for a few days and now luckily I'm back down to a simmer. Ok, a boil, but a low boil. I'm ok with the giving birth thing again but hot damn I'm going to have to take care of a teeny human and keep it alive somehow and did I mention KEEP IT. Like ALL THE TIME KEEP IT. What am I going to DO with her? I don't know what you do with babies! Like. Like what do you DO with them?! Hold her, feed her, change her, okkaaayyy but like. . . don't I have to entertain her or something? Like, won't she get bored and expect me to DO something to make her not bored? And if I suck at it and I'm not educational enough she could turn out stoopid right? I don't want to make a stoopid baby!

SHHHIIIT. Shit. And. Damn.

Just how many times can one play peek-a-boo and sing wheels-on-the-bus before one goes insane and their baby get's bored again? THEN WHAT!? (I'm not buying her Baby Einstien vidoes. (No offense, don't get pissed at me I just don't want to raise a t.v. baby)) BUT WHAT AM I GOING TO DO WITH HER!? Read books? Give her toys? When will I have time to do anything when I'm entertaining a little pooping human 24 hours a day?

Shit.

6 comments:

  1. Your soooo good with kiddos.....it will all come naturally to you....you will love her so much...you wont want to put her down...well maybe sometimes...but not always....you'll dress her up all cute and stuff....you and C will figure it all out....and...you have us here in blogger world to offer our advice...you can do it mama!

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  2. LOL I let your baby smear a 1/2 tube of lipstick all over himself - I'm not so great with kiddos after all.

    (sorry bought that again)

    Isaiah told me to take a picture - I should have listened to him but I was afraid to show you just how much he had all over his sweet face. (funny enough, he knew to put it on his lips (and chin and cheeks) but the general area - smart baby!)

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  3. It's so different when they're yours. For the first 2 weeks after I brought Audrey home I was freaking out about the same thing..I have to keep this kid all the time, etc. You will look at Daisy sleeping peacefully in her crib and go "holy shit, I have never felt love like this. Right there is my heart outside of my body," and you will never be able to imagine a day without her...

    As for keeping her entertained, do you know what my kid's favorite thing to do, at 11 months old, is?...sit there and bite and crinkle a buttwipe package for like, EVER. If you give her a cup, a shoe, or a ball, she's happy as a clam. Most tiny people are entertained by the stupidest things, not fluffy stuffed animals or expensive doo-dads. She does, however, love things with flashy lights and music...

    You'll do great! I have absolute faith in that.

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  4. You will do fine. Don't worry you are a very loving person. That love will definitly transfer to your ability for caring and raising your baby. All you have to do is water and feed her, she will let you know what else she needs. Kind of like a dog. ☺ Kidding, but still really easy once you get the diaper thing down. Just remember to cherish every second with her. A moment lasts a lifetime. Love and miss you Lindy Star.
    ♥ Corey Jo

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  5. It will come natural. I think all women just know how (after a few days) to take care of a baby like men just kind of know how to work on cars. When baby edgar was born, daddy edgar did not know anything about taking care of a baby and he just watched me and later he just did it. I returned to work when baby was 6 weeks (had to- did not want to, but financially i had to.)and he would stay with daddy for 8 hours and when I came home he was clean, fed, changed clothes and diaper asleep in his bed. We split the taking care of him- he'll change a diaper or two and then i will change some, if i am changing diapers and clothes to go somewhere- he will prepare a bottle and pack the diaper bag. It's weird how you and Chino will just work together taking care of her. He works and I work too so that is why I guess we are 50/50. I know some hispanic women who have to do everything and i mean everything while their husband is out around town or at dances. i do not understand that. is it like that in all cultures? asking because i do not hang with too many american couples, all my firends have a hispanic wife or husband. Well don't be nervous. (easier said than done) Don't worry by the time Daisy is walking you will be a pro at taking on the next!!! (jejejeje

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  6. Babies don't get bored, remember everything is new to them. Everything.
    I believe that there are two important things that you can do, one is hold them. you cannot spoil a baby by holding it, I had my kids in a pouch for a long time and they were all good contented babies. The other is talk to them using discriptors. Tell them things like look at the red ball. Daisy is drinking milk, the milk tastes good etc. It doesn't have to be as Dick and Jane as that but you get the idea. Read to them, they will want you to read the same books over and over, but it's important to do it, so they get a love of reading. I still think I can recite "Good Night Moon" but I had my 3 kids over a ten year period, I think it was 15 years before I ate warm food at dinner once I started having kids.
    Do your best and don't beat your self up over stuff.
    Oh, and the best parenting advice I ever got was "When they are thirty will anyone care?". No one will ask them at a cocktail party when they are thirty at what age they stopped wearing diapers or if they sucked their thumb.

    It's a big responsibility, but you will never feel the total love you will have when Daisy is born. It's a hormone thing, but it's real.
    regards,
    Theresa

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